The following is a special post from Shondell from Call Me What You Want Even Cheap as part of the Yakezie blog swap. This week, we are all discussing how to handle money when in a relationship. You can read my post on the same topic at Nickel by Nickel.
There has been much talk about money and marriage lately, and so there should be considering money is the number one reason for divorce. Money is one of those topics that can be so uncomfortable to talk about, but once you start talking about it with your significant other the easier it gets. Here are my tips for a long lasting relationship with your honey and money.
Be open and honest
Too many couples miss the boat on this one. Hiding money from your spouse means there is a breakdown in the relationship. I know way too many people that do this for a whole bunch of reasons that they've justified in their head. Honesty is of course the best policy.
Do a monthly budget TOGETHER
Combine your finances
Although I know this may not work for everyone, it's worth a try. Being on the same page with your honey about money will only help the both of you to be in sync in other areas as well. If you could master one of the biggest things that cause divorce, imagine what else the both of you can master.
Review financial goals together
Where do you and your spouse wish to be in 1, 5, or even 10 years. Make some short and long term goals and create a plan to get there together. It's amazing what two people on the same page can accomplish. Reviewing your goals at least once a year, ensures that you both are on the same page and on track.
Compromise
You may be married to a control freak, or maybe you're it. These are people that want things done their way, or no way. That just won't work if you want to be married for a long time. There has to be some wiggle room. Be open and willing to budge a little for your honey. Besides, life is much better when you're not in control of everything.
Image: The Sean & Lauren Spectacular/flickr
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I’m definitely the control freak in the relationship. Making compromises works!
Lol. It is good to know who if you are a controlling one. It helps in being self reflective when trying to work together.
I am the control freak as well. I have already loosened up since I am getting married in a few months and we’ll be combining our finances. It won’t just be about me anymore.
I have to work to suppress my inner control freak! That came up right after we got married when I had to give up using Excel to track our spending because my husband preferred Mint. I think I had to lose that “battle” of tracking method to win the “war” of tracking everything exactly!
Wow. I didn’t realize the female readers of this blog were such power women. I guess it makes sense. If you are reading this, you care about the money.
My husband is very ABLE to manage the finances – in some ways he is more competent than I am – but I’m just more INTERESTED in handling the nitty-gritty of moving money around and such. We decide everything together though.
That makes sense. I have never had to share finances before, so I’m sure it will be a challenge. Particularly if I end up with someone who cares as much as I do.
I’m going to have to join the other girls here, I also find it rather hard to control a little less when it comes to money!
Do you share the responsibility or handle most everything yourself?
Haha, and yet another control freak here. I’m pretty easy going as a rule, and in other things generally too, but finances? That’s where I crack down. (One of us has to..)
Is your fiance not as good with the money as you are?